Thursday, January 28, 2016

Reconnecting with a love

Long time no blog.  

And I miss it. 
I myself am not reading blogs so much any more but, I miss writing this one. 
I have a dialogue with you, running in my head so much of the time. I've thought about posting and then overthink it and don't. 
But I think tonight, I will start again, because I read that someone had checked to see if we were still writing. 
Sometimes in life, I say this as a 68 years old wisenheimer, you just have to do what feels right.  And, gull darn it, this just feels good. 

Life is tripping me out currently. My husband has 2 different cancers and my 95 year old father is unable to get the words in his mind to his tongue. This funnels down to looking at my own aging and how I will possibly deal with a potential life changing disease or having to eat non-organic food, without a glass of wine, in the dining room of assisted living, with a multitude of other old people at various degrees of physical and mental abilities. 

But enough of the heavy thinking. I like this blogging thing and will continue it.  I was recently reading one of my journals from 2004, and I was reflecting on marriage. The entry was on our 36th wedding anniversary. My question to myself was "How do you stay married to the same person for 36 years?". This is what I wrote:

"I don't know for sure, but perhaps you:

Appreciate the balance the other person creates in your life.

Give up competing with your spouse. (Except, of course, when you play Scrabble.)

Know your partner very well before marriage, --well, at least their good points. (At the beginning of a life-time relationship, you are blind to any defect). Knowing the other's positive traits will be very useful. At times of conflict, being able to draw on the positive, reinforces your commitment.

Decrease your expectations. Don't make so many plans. Let nature take its course. 

Bring children into your life.

Continue to have mutual goals and dreams.

Discover new places and new things together. Near or far.

Keep surprising each other.

Be thoughtful."

When I read this, I thought "I'd like to blog that", and so I have.  Thank you for your interest and encouragement. 



  1. Glad to see you post again. You are such a strong person and have been demonstrating your strength and resilience so much in the past several months. You are so loved.

  2. I love the blog, and I love you being genuine and sharing what is on your heart. These are some great words of wisdom I will hold on to. Thank you, Aunt Carol! Love you!

  3. Late to the game, here. I hope you find this, at some point, and I hope time has been kind to you in the two intervening years. I love your 'anniversary" thoughts, nodding my head in recognition all the way.
    Be well.