so i did a quick trip to albertson's friday morning. i had to get one item... ricotta cheese.
it is not one of my normal shopping stops, but since it is close, it is good for those random forgotten items.
when i first went in the door, i noticed an advertisement for a game they started. monopoly. you know those grocery store gimmicks (which by the way, i just looked up in my dictionary circa 1972... and the first definition of gimmick is: a secret means of controlling a prize wheel, ect. anything that tricks or mystifies; deceptive or secret device) telling... very telling.
now, i had two reactions to this... almost simultaneously. one being oooh a monopoly game. fun! and the second being, ugh! not another scam game.
(When I walked into my Albertsons, there was this poor guy dressed up like the Monopoly man passing out the game boards.)
i remember the great albertson game fiasco of 2011... (or 2012... or whenever) when i was so into it. i would spend so much time obsessing about what stickers i needed to win a hawaiian vacation. i didn't win anything. i had 16 duplicate stickers for multiple items, and was one sticker away from winning 10 million dollars... but not even a $5.00 shopping spree was to be had. I too, was instantly brought back to the last time they did this Collect- these- tiny- coupons- lick- and- stick- ‘em- on- a- game- board- game- waste- hours- hoping- to-win- an- elusive- prize game of 2012… and so when I saw the poor 19 year old kid dressed as a Monopoly man I, like my sister, had two very opposite feelings at the exact same time. YeS!!! FUN!!! I’m may win a prize!!! And at the same time… No!!! UrGH!!! Puhlease…I’m no sucker!!!
nevertheless, within 10 feet of walking in the door, i had 3 packages of red vines in my hand.
you get a bonus ticket for each package. i excused this for myself by thinking that they would be great for a movie night over the weekend.
I kept right on task- Next to the can of olives I was going to buy was another can...that came
with a bonus ticket! I was not swayed. In my head kept running the puhlease!!!
I’m no sucker! I picked up the can I would normally buy and congratulated myself for not getting caught up in the sham, racket, flimflam.
then, when i got to the checkout line, i was thinking, if the checker asks if i am playing the monopoly game, should i tell her no? it is like the classic angel on one shoulder, devil on the other. but in this case, one one shoulder is a calm and sensible gentleman shaking his head.
with the supreme knowledge that nothing will come out of this "game" other than a littering of spare game pieces at the bottom of my purse, and possibly adhesive on the tickets that might make me sick when i lick them. on the other shoulder is a fun 17 year old. jumping up and down. her side ponytail flipping around. squealing in delight at the prospect of $10,000,000. or maybe just a hawaiian vacation.
I made it to the check out all proud of myself. The checker said to the old woman in front of me, “ You earned 5 game tickets” And my pulse quickened! See, I AM a sucker… I just try to keep that in check. But being a sucker can be so much FUN! So, when the old woman said “No, I don’t need those”. I wanted to scream “Give ‘em here!” or at least say politely, “I’ll take them.” But I didn’t. Instead I thought…wow-what a responsible, sane old woman. I thought that for a moment but I did collect my (1) ticket and on my way out I thought… I like playing games. It’s fun. Darn it. I should have asked that old lady who doesn't play shell games for her tickets.
so when the checker handed me my 4 tickets i calmly accepted them. however, i didn't take the game board....not from my checkers line at least. i was still in the middle of the battle between mr. sensible, and miss fun. but as i walked towards the exit, i stopped at the last check line before the door. to grab a game board.
i did however use a wet paper towel to moisten the game pieces. Not me… That toxic glue is delish! Do you remember when we’d go to the post office with mom if she had a bunch of mail like a pile of Christmas cards? and how fun it was to lick the stamps?!
cheers! -Jennifer XO, April
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